Mendel Bluming | Blogger

In many families, it is strictly forbidden for any unmarried person to sit at the corner of the table. Many were told from a young age that if you do sit at a corner, you will never get married. Have you ever heard of this? Is this a Jewish belief? This belief is widely held, and has been handed down for generations in a range of cultures. If your grandmother is Polish, Russian, Hungarian, Romanian or Ukrainian then there is a good chance she grew up with this superstition. The fact that many Jewish families originate from those countries may explain why so many share this belief. But it doesn't come from a Jewish source. Judaism forbids the adoption of beliefs and practices that are not sourced in our own tradition, unless they have a logical reason behind them. So if a black cat passes in front of you, we don't believe that means you will have bad luck. But walking under a ladder may bring bad luck, if someone falls on you. So avoiding ladders makes sense, avoid...

Menachem Bluming Muses Lately, some are cautioning against wearing a Kippah publicly due to mounting Anti Semitism. Should Kippahs be removed in public to protect safety? Here’s a thought: There are two ways to wear a kippah. You can wear it on your head, or you can wear it in your head. Wearing a kippah on your head means it is an article of clothing, an accessory, an external addition to your self. Wearing it in your head means it is part of you, it is a fixture, a piece of your very self. It is not just what you wear, it is who you are. If your kippah is on your head, you can take it off. If it's in your head, then you can never remove it. It is you. And you can't stop being you, even if others don't like it. We need to take every precaution to ensure our safety. Take a course in martial arts, go out in groups. But we can't stop being who we are. Once we retreat from our own identity, we are already a victim, even if no one tries to harm ...

In the Zohar Haazinu 291a it teaches that Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai spent the last moments of his life doing what he always did: teaching. The mystical ideas that he shared with his devoted students that day were the deepest and most revolutionary teachings he had ever revealed. But as he conveyed this parting message, there was tension in heaven. Rabbi Shimon's death was ordained to be that day before sundown. As the afternoon stretched on and evening approached, he had not yet finished sharing his final wisdom. The day would soon be over, but the lesson was not. Rabbi Shimon refused to return his soul until he had revealed all the secrets that it held. His life could only come to end when his mission came to an end. But time was running out. And so the day didn't end. The setting sun slowed down, and daylight was extended to allow Rabbi Shimon to say all he needed to say. Only after he had completed his lesson did his holy soul depart and the sun finally set. On t...

I look at the empty Seder plate with this lonely chicken neck left behind, and wonder, why is it there? Here’s a thought: One of the most amazing characters in the story of the Exodus is Pharaoh. He witnessed with his own eyes the downfall of his country, he experienced firsthand the miracles of the Ten Plagues one after the other, he saw how every prediction Moses made came true, and yet he stubbornly refused to let the Israelites go. Only when every firstborn Egyptian died in the final plague did he relent and let them go. Stubbornness is sometimes called having a stiff neck. The neck connects our head to our body, representing the passageway that translates what we see with our eyes and know with our mind into what we feel with our heart and do with our body. A stiff-necked person is unmoved by what they know to be true. They have blocked neck, and the message just doesn't reach their heart. This was Pharaoh's problem. Indeed, the Hebrew word for neck is הערף...

Here’s a thought: You are out for a romantic dinner, just the two of you. You make a reservation at a fancy restaurant, a quiet table for two in the corner. Gentle music is playing, lights are dimmed, and the ambiance is just perfect for a romantic evening. You resolve not to talk about work, not to talk about the kids, rather to take the time to really connect and enjoy each other's company. You laugh together, chit chat, and give one another complete focus and attention. Then suddenly you say, "Oh, I just remembered something." You take out your phone and call your business partner to remind him to send a report you are waiting for. It all took no more than fifteen seconds. You quickly put your phone away and smile at your wife. But she's not smiling. You just ruined the moment. You destroyed the atmosphere. Until now it was all about the two of you. As soon as you took out your phone, the ambiance was shattered. You brought the outside world into ...

Haman in the Megilah of Purim had it all! His political position was second to the King! He had great wealth and a large family and a caring wife. He seems to have had good health and the people honored him to the point that they bowed when he came by! Yet there was one man who irritated him to no end! Mordechai. That one man refused to bow to him, would not even bend when he came by. He could not tolerate this!! He became so enraged that this ultimately brought to his downfall. In your world are you furiously irritated by something that causes you to overlook the tremendous blessing that fills your life? Menachem Mendel Bluming has been a rabbi in Potomac, Maryland since 2003

The argument goes, by living together you can know how someone behaves in various situations. Once you have spent a year or so under one roof, you have tested the relationship to see if it can withstand the varied pressures of life. But wait. That isn't true. You only know how things are for that year. You haven't seen how things will be five years from now. A lot can happen in five years. Surely you need to spend five years together to see how that works before committing for a lifetime.     And then there is the concern about what may happen in ten years. People change, we grow older, sometimes wiser, sometimes not. So you should really live together for a decade before deciding to commit. And what about children? They change the equation entirely. You need to have kids first to see how the relationship will be when you have kids. And then, a lot of relationships become strained once the kids move out. Maybe you should live together through empty-nesting and ol...