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Showing posts from May, 2020

Menachem Bluming Muses: Being a Partner at Home in Quarantine and in Torah

At times husbands offers to help out and in his mind he is being sincere, and yet his wife sees him as unhelpful and does not accept his offer. Sometimes what the husband says and what his wife hears are miles apart. We need to appreciate how our words come across. She may be hearing the opposite of what he meant. So when you say: "If you need any help preparing dinner I am happy to help you. Just let me know, I'm right here in the living room." You thought that was being nice. But your wife hears: "I am going to the couch to chill. If you really desperately need me, then you will have to come and disturb my peace and I will reluctantly come and cut up a few vegetables like a martyr." Not a very convincing offer. Even though you didn't say it in those words, between the lines you implied a willingness to help, but not an eagerness. You are not presenting yourself as being at her service, but rather as not opposed to doing your bit if it i

Menachem Bluming Muses: Will We Ever Go Back to Normal?

What is normal? If we know anything at all, it’s that the definition has radically changed over the last two months. Normal used to be commuting to and from work each day, but Corona has forced us to reconsider whether we need to commute at all or if we can work entirely from home. Normal used to involve eating out multiple times a week, but Corona has necessitated that we learn how to eat primarily from our own kitchens. Normal used to mean entertainment required Broadway shows, movies, and concerts, but we have shattered that notion by entertaining ourselves at home with our families and online Torah classes. Normal Saturday nights used to mean getting dressed up and going out with friends; now we happily stay in with family, play games, and eat popcorn. Normal used to be getting dressed up and driving out to attend celebrations. Corona has shown us that we can celebrate via Zoom. Normal used to be that in order to be happy, we needed to make lots of money,

Menachem Bluming Muses: Where is G-d in This Pandemic?!

If G-d is calling to get our attention, then it is indeed quite impressive. Within the space of a few weeks, the world has changed drastically. Every single person on the planet has had to pause, stop the way they've been living their life until now, re-evaluate their priorities and what's really important, spend more time caring for their loved ones and less time in usual pursuits. The virus has equally affected those with money, fame and possessions. The only currencies that have any true value are our relationships and our faith. We have learnt that everything we do, even staying home, has a purpose and a meaning, and every individual impacts everyone else. What's even more impressive is that the world has been transformed without any miracles. We have come to these realizations on our own, without being forced, with our free choice intact. That is an amazing act of G-d. Or maybe not. The other option is that there is no G-d, this is just one of those thing

Menachem Bluming Muses: COVID-19 and Your Family

How ironic is it? We live in the age of communication and an unprecedented era of unimaginable connectivity. At the touch of a button, you can see and hear a person at the other end of the world - for free! And for not much more, you can visit that person and be there in less than a day! The advent of technological advances - no, miracles! - has changed the way we communicate and brought us together in ways our great-grandparents would have thought inconceivable. And yet, in a twist of historic irony, the most connected generation to date is not allowed to leave home. The most social, global community ever has taken to social distancing. One of the lessons we are learning is this: It's great that you can communicate effortlessly with someone across the globe from you. Can you communicate with the person across the table from you? We've conquered the world; but have we done well with our own homes? We've connected thousands and millions of friends and fol